first marathon race report

saturday may 24, 2003-- 47 degrees and drizzling--traverse city michigan

here are some of the thoughts that sailed through my head during the event.....

6:58am: wow, i must really be well trained... this is a lot easier than i expected

6:59am: hrm... i guess it hasn't started yet

7:00am: i just crossed the start line and i'm tired

7:30am: that man in front of me has quite a distinctive odor

7:43am: why isn't anybody else wearing a shirt/gown thing?

8:17am: i think i'll buy my cat dottie a treadmill and a new bikini with the $1000 first place prize money

8:38:42am: okay, i'm half-way there, feeling pretty good

8:38:44am: holy shit... i'm only half way there

9:05am: that should be the finish line just ahead... nope... looks the mile 16 marker... that's disappointing, i thought i had a real shot at the record

9:35am: i have no desire to go dancing right now

10:00am: various onlookers are yelling things like "looking great!"... "keep it up".... "finish strong"... all i could think was --i want each and everyone one of you people to die

10:22am: will i ever be able to squat thrust again?

10:29am: i think i'm giving birth

10:34am: nipple tassels probably would have made me faster

10:37:38am: i'm finished note: no feelings of elation crossed my mind at this point... just pure anger at my stupidity for not only participating in such an event, but paying to do so

although the marathon itself wasn't a walk in the park, i'm glad erik kamman persuaded me to run one. i enjoyed the worst quadricep muscle cramps of my life during the last 5.5 miles, so i'm proud of the fact i made it to the finish line. i finished in 3:37:38...just 92 minutes off the world record. i hate to say it, but the moon boots may have slowed me up a bit. erik and i made it through the marathon and all the training without any long-term injuries.... so it was a big success. i had a great time training with erik and michelle and brian. thanks to everyone for all the nice support. and my sincerest apologies to everyone, especially adrienne, who had to put up with 6 months of conversations about marathon running.